10 Things not to ask a guy who shit a little at an office meeting. (or maybe the first 10 things you should ask a guy who shit a little at an office meeting)

1. Do you think I can’t smell that? You know I can smell that, right?
2. For future reference, if you shart and yell “Synergy!” we will think you planned it.
3. You know we think you did that on purpose, right?
4. You want to maybe spew some really inappropriate racial slurs to make this room an unbearable pressure cooker or both olfactory and ethical outrage?
5. Would you like your secret santa to get you a pair of boxer shorts with a sound card in them then will play “the Gambler” when it senses a shart? Because I feel you neither know when to hold them or when to fold them.
6. If you leave this meeting, you may get fired, if you stay, you may be clubbed to death by us. What you gonna do holmes? What you gonna do?
7. Is there a way you can spin that stink bomb into a positive?
8. You may not know it, but you’re shart is laying cover for my shart, does that make you feel better? No?
9. You realize that chair is now going to be called “the shit chair” right? And we are going to look at each other and laugh when ever we have a new employee that sits in the shit chair. And then we are going to call them ‘shit chair Alice’ or ‘shart chair Frank’ there by passing the humiliation along for generations.
10. Did you hear what the what the overall net returns for third quarter where, or where you too busy filling your shorts with what appears to be hot steaming death?